I am a bitch, this is not some life shocking revelation. i have always been one probably from conception and i will probably die one. But lately i have been especially bitch everything and everyone pisses me off, and no i am not pregnant one would have to be having sex for that to happen but that a whole very depressing story that i might share later. Anyways, i've just come back from thanksgiving break and i don't want to fucking be here and i don't want to be home. So where does that leave me? Fucking nowhere? and it pissing me off. I don't know what my problem is and I guess at 19 I shouldn't? But I can't help but feel i am behind my peers when it come for the whole life plan thing that through the few sober moments we share everyone seems to have all planned out except me. But i know my feeling aren't unique quite the contrary I am in the majority but i can't help but feel alone, and the loneliness is overwhelming and its killing me.
I hate feeling alone even though i usually separate myself by choice from people, but it still gets to me on a much deeper level than i am used to. Is this growing up or maturing or whatever the fuck Dr. Phil would have to say about it. I don't know?! But what i do know that its scary and uncharted territory that is very foreign to me.
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